Source : Perth Now news
Parents have been urged to speak openly – but cautiously – with their children about mental health and body image as the rates of eating disorders skyrocket among young Australians.
This week, media personality Carrie Bickmore said she didn’t know “how to think or feel” about videos of American singer Ariana Grande, who appeared severely underweight.
Speaking on the Carrie and Tommy show, Bickmore said her daughters “idolise” the Wicked star, but discussing her health issues with them wouldn’t be easy.
In the video, Bickmore said she was planning to show the clip to her young daughters but wasn’t sure how she would bring up the subject of Grande’s “frail” figure.
“I didn’t know what I was meant to say to my girls,” she said.
“I don’t want them focusing on her body, I want them focusing on her talent.
“Cause she’s incredibly talented and she’s such a hard worker and that’s what I want the focusing on.”
Eating disorders, such as anorexia nervosa and bulimia, affect between four and 16 per cent of Australians, with rates steadily increasing over the past two decades.
A 2022 study found disordered eating was most prevalent among young people and adolescents, mostly young women and those in the LGBTQIA+ community.
Between 2013 and 2018, the rates of people living with eating disorders across the world increased from 3.2 per cent to 7.8 per cent, with about 3.3 million lives lost to the disorder every year.
How to talk to children about eating disorders
Discussing eating disorders and the change in a celebrity’s appearance is a difficult topic to bring up with children, family therapist and Eating Disorders Victoria (EDV) director of operations and programs Sarah Politt told NewsWire.
“Talking to your kids about celebrities’ weight changes is hard, and it’s normal to feel worried,” she said.
Ms Politt said parents should “not be afraid” to have an open conversation with their children about the health of their favourite pop star.
“Key tips would be don’t be afraid to have a conversation. Stay curious and resist jumping straight in: ‘I’ve seen this news about Ariana, I know you love her, how are you feeling about it?’ Then listen first, share your concerns and go from there,” she said.
Associated Counsellors and Psychologists Sydney clinic director Dan Auerbach said primary school children should be spoken in a “brief and factual” manner about eating disorders.
Teenagers are a different story, which could present its own challenges.
He said parents of teenagers should have a “real conversation” about eating disorders, which he said may lead to arguments “since they will often defend either the celebrity or the commentary as a way of testing what you actually think”.
“Teenagers are the group most exposed to this material and the least likely to raise it at home, so the parent usually has to go first,” he said.
What parents should avoid saying to their children
Despite the importance of the topic, Mr Auerbach said bringing up a celebrity’s physical appearance may do more harm than good.
“The instinct is to reassure a child by commenting on how the celebrity looks, and whether the comment is concerned or approving it lands the same way because the child hears that adults watch bodies closely and form judgments about them,” he said.
He urged parents to say “very little about the person’s body” and “quite a lot about the pressure they are under”.
“The more useful move is to shift the conversation from how someone looks to what it might be like to have millions of strangers discussing your body, which is a pressure no child has to work hard to imagine,” Mr Auerbach said.
“It is also worth saying plainly that eating disorders are illnesses rather than choices or vanity, and that you cannot tell whether someone has one by looking at them.”
Eating disorder / mental health helplines
Parents should also try and avoid using language that may encourage disordered eating.
“What happens at your own kitchen table matters more than the conversation about the celebrity,” Mr Auerbach said.
“A parent who talks about ‘needing to be good today’, or who comments critically on their own body in the mirror, is teaching a lesson that outweighs anything said about a pop star.”
A new Butterfly Foundation survey found that 84 per cent of Australians find it harder to speak kindly about their own body than someone else’s.
“Most people know that they would never say to a friend the unkind things they say to themselves,” Butterfly head of prevention Helen Bird said.
“But negative body talk has become so normalised that it can influence how people eat, move, socialise and participate in everyday life.
“Being kinder to our own bodies is about building small, simple actions into everyday life.”
Signs parents should watch for
EDV chief executive Paul Bird said while it was important to be open with children about bodies and weight, it was also imperative to watch for signs of disordered eating.
“Eating disorders are on the rise, so it’s crucial parents know the signs,” he told NewsWire.
“Be aware of any shift in their usual patterns around eating. It may not be eating less, it could also look like ‘I’m going to be healthy’. Any secrecy – for example, snacks going missing – or rigidity are also shifts to watch for.”
Mr Auerbach said there were some signs that should warrant immediate action, including a child entering a “sudden intense exercise routine” or developing a “preoccupation with weight or appearance that has changed the child’s mood”.
Mr Bird said parents should encourage conversations with their children and create a safe space for them to speak openly.
“We understand parents’ anxiety about their kids seeing content that challenges their ideas about their body or weight,” he said.
“There’s a lot they can do to protect their kids against the risk of eating disorders.
“Open conversations, showing that you accept all body types, and not moralising food choices can all go a long way.”
