Source : INDIA TODAY NEWS
Can infidelity ever be dismissed as “just a mistake”, or is it always a conscious choice?
That’s exactly the debate actor Ram Kapoor has ignited after sharing his views on marriage and cheating during an episode of Lock Upp: Sach Ya Sazaa.
While Kapoor argued that a single act of infidelity need not end a marriage, actress Akansha Chamola strongly disagreed, saying cheating is far too deliberate to be brushed aside.
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It all started when fellow contestant Shreya Kalra asked, “Agar aapke partner ne aap par cheat kiya toh what is the solution? Do you find other options or not be connected with your partner because once it is broken, you don’t feel the connect…”(If you find out that your partner cheated on you, what’s the solution? Do you find other options or do you don’t feel connected…)
To this, Kapoor said that “you have to find the connections again” as marriages are complex and require constant effort.
“If you really love your partner, nothing is a dealbreaker. Marriage is hard and it’s a journey. You have to work at your marriage every day. Kabhi kabhi agar lamba samjho 20-25 saal hogaye, you have highs and lows, good periods and bad periods, strong phases and weak phases. Bad phase mai agar galti se kisi ek se kuch hojaye, agar aap unke begair nhi jee sakte, apne bachon ke begair nhi jee sakte and agar bachon ke liye, family ke liye best chaiye toh then time heals everything and nothing is a dealbreaker,” he said. (During a bad phase, if by mistake something happens by one partner, and you can’t live without your partner or your children, then time heals everything and nothing is a dealbreaker.)
Chamola wasn’t convinced. Challenging Kapoor’s argument, she said, “But sir, galti se nahi hota yeh cheez. It’s not a mistake. You are physically intimate with someone. That’s a process. You have to take somebody’s clothes off, take your clothes off, and then do it. You cannot say it’s a mistake. It’s not like I stabbed you by mistake.”
Kapoor, however, continued to defend his stance.
Ofcourse the conversation was not limited to the contestants on the show. Snippets from the show have now gone viral and everyone has an opinion.
But this is not the first time debate around infidelity has emerged. Modern relationships don’t exactly come with a rulebook anymore. Between increasing discussions about open relationships, polyamory and couples creating their own boundaries, the definition of cheating isn’t as black and white as it once was. It’s all things 50 shades of grey and more according to experts.
Here’s what relationship experts think about cheating being a dealbreaker or not.
Infidelity always a dealbreaker?
For Priyanka Kapoor, a Mumbai-based couple and family counsellor, if a person wants to stay in a happy, committed relationship, infidelity remains a dealbreaker.
Speaking with India Today about cheating in relationships, Kapoor said, “In marriages where infidelity is okay, there is a mutual understanding for their convenience. That relationship is shallow. Otherwise, people prefer monogamy, and infidelity is non-negotiable. That helps the couple develop trust and respect for each other. It’s absolutely a breach of trust.”
Ruchi Ruuh, a Delhi-based relationship expert, however, believes there is no universal definition of a dealbreaker because every relationship operates within its own boundaries. “Whether it’s a dealbreaker depends on the couple’s values, history in other relationships, and capacity for repair.”
According to Ruuh, what qualifies as infidelity has evolved over the years. Rather than following rigid social norms, many couples today define cheating based on the boundaries they have mutually agreed upon.
She believes the conversation around infidelity has also shifted. Where it was once viewed almost exclusively as a moral failure, it is now increasingly discussed through the lens of relationship dynamics, emotional needs and communication. “With therapy, podcasts, and pop culture normalising these conversations, the shame narrative is giving way to curiosity and understanding.”
According to experts, cheating often signals deeper cracks in a relationship – from unmet needs to communication gaps to emotional distance. But instead of walking away, many couples are choosing to work through betrayal, driven by shared lives, responsibilities, believing that trust can be rebuilt through honest conversations, accountability and, sometimes, therapy.
And this isn’t the first time celebrities have debated what counts as the bigger betrayal. Last year, on Kajol and Twinkle Khanna’s chat show Two Much, guests Karan Johar and Janhvi Kapoor were asked whether emotional or physical cheating was worse. While Kapoor debated that both are wrong, others sided with emotional betrayal.
That, however, doesn’t mean betrayal leaves no scars.
Both Kapoor and Ruuh agree that couples can be together despite infidelity and sometimes even come out stronger, but it would require immense effort and commitment and healing would take time. At the end, it’s about what led to it, and whether the relationship is strong enough to survive what comes after.
– Ends
SOURCE :- TIMES OF INDIA
